Lead or Follow

     This has been a full day!  Nick is doing well.  He has had a little problem with his PICC line and they are going to have to redo that.  He is not excited about that at all!!  I am doing well.  I went home to Jackson for the night, and Amanda came to stay with Nick.  I had a biopsy done today.  My doctor is almost certain that it will be nothing of concern.  I should know for sure in a few days.  Glenn is  having some tests done tomorrow...nothing big and serious, but I would appreciate your praying for him as well.  Of course we will always need prayer, but it will be fine with me when we don't have to ask for quite so much! (Can I get a witness!)
     As Nick and I were walking a couple of days ago we began talking about how this adventure felt.  I know that I have expressed how much peace we are experiencing, but this time we were talking about the emotions.  The fact is that there has been almost a complete lack of emotions.  Yes, I had my short bouts of tears when he was first diagnosed, but since then each day has just been very matter-of-fact.  We have actually laughed and just enjoyed each other's company  more in the last couple of weeks than we have in years.
     There is certainly nothing wrong with emotions.  God created us as emotional beings.  Jesus wept.  In the garden of Gethsemane He was in such anguish that He sweated drops of blood.  He was obviously a bit put out with His Mom when she suggested that He turn the water into wine.  When He saw the money changers He plaited a whip and showed those guys an emotion or two.  He was obviously frustrated and got a bit sarcastic with the chosen 12 when they just didn't get what He was saying about the leaven of Herod and the Pharisees.  Just think about the compassion and love that must have been on His face as he looked at the little children who just wanted to be near Him. 
         I heard something on the radio a couple of days ago that has stuck with me.  It was a quote from the the movie Fireproof:  "Don't follow your heart.  Instead, lead your heart."  This was so profound to me.  Emotions certainly are part of our God designed makeup.  They give life flavor, variety, and even trigger physiological responses, but they, like so many other things in life have an element of choice.   After the initial elation, sadness, or anger, life still needs to go on.  Let's lead our hearts and follow Jesus.  He provides the balance and stability that our hearts just can not give.  It is well.