Today is the end of the month of Lori. For those of you who do not know, I am quite a goof ball about my birthday (Oct. 29th). Years ago (I don't remember why) I started proclaiming this designation on Oct. 1st. My family humored me. I even started handing out tiaras for other women to wear on their birthdays. I was known as the birthday fairy at church, and I did that for a number of years.
O.k. men...I can only speak accurately from a woman's perspective. So, that's is what I am about to do.
As women, we typically wear so many hats: wife, mother, teacher, student, daughter, sister, friend, nurse, doctor, pastor, engineer, landscaper, author, editor, cruise director, purchasing agent, accountant, carpenter, plumber, chauffeur, fashion consultant, seamstress, interior designer, chef, maid...etc...AND...that's all before we leave the house to go to work. If we are not careful we will get caught up in defining ourselves by all of the things that we do, and forget who we really are.
I used to give out those tiaras because I wanted women to have a license to feel special and connect with their true identity at least one day a year. My hope was that they would realize who they really were, and that the knowledge would last. We, as Christians, are LITERALLY sons and daughters of the KING...princes and princesses - hence the tiaras.
I realized this year, as my birthday came and went, that it (my birthday) didn't matter so much to me anymore. By the grace of God, I believe that I finally have more of a grasp on who I am in Christ. We have been so wrapped in His care and loving-kindness since this adventure began that it would have been difficult not to see His hand covering us.
Nick is back at Vanderbilt (Rm 11020.) The plan that I wrote about in my last blog entry has begun to be executed. He is supposed to come home this Saturday.
Who am I? Yes, I am the mom of a son who is battling for his life, but, birthday or not...I am a princess whose son is a prince. It is well.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
We Have A Plan
O.K....Here's the plan: Nick is being admitted this Monday and staying at Vandy all week. They are going to aggressively hit the the remaining stupid cancer cells that mistakenly believe that they belong in my son's body. He will then come home for 2 to 3 weeks while his body recovers. During that time he will be in pseudo isolation. I have to Clorox and Lysol everything in sight. (No problem...we have a plan!)
Then we will go back for another week (shampoo, rinse, and repeat...so to speak.) After coming home again for a couple of weeks it will be bone marrow transplant time. As Nick's doctor told him,"For your sister it's a one day process. For you it's three months." Amanda will go in for 1 to 2 days and have marrow harvested. Nick will be inpatient for awhile, don't know how long, and will need to stay in Nashville for the rest of the three months. We will have to have some sort of apartment-type accommodations so that Nick can be near Vanderbilt and receive treatments as an outpatient. At the end of the 100 days, Nick should just need maintenance chemo. It's good to have a plan!
I must add that this plan is just that...a plan. We fully expect God to order our steps and intervene in ways that only He can. He has moved in miraculous ways so far. So, even though there are lots of questions about how this will all work, I know that He will work it out.
We are learning first hand about what God says about how He cares for us:
Luke 12
22 Then He said to His disciples, “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on. 23 Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing. 24 Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds? 25 And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? 26 If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest? 27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 28 If then God so clothes the grass, which today is in the field and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith?
Personal request: Please do not wait until a very difficult time in your life to begin to trust God with your life. If we had not had the foundation of relationship with Him before this adventure began I can not even imagine what it would be like now. Get to know Him. Dare to take Him at His Word. There won't be a moment of regret! It is well.
Then we will go back for another week (shampoo, rinse, and repeat...so to speak.) After coming home again for a couple of weeks it will be bone marrow transplant time. As Nick's doctor told him,"For your sister it's a one day process. For you it's three months." Amanda will go in for 1 to 2 days and have marrow harvested. Nick will be inpatient for awhile, don't know how long, and will need to stay in Nashville for the rest of the three months. We will have to have some sort of apartment-type accommodations so that Nick can be near Vanderbilt and receive treatments as an outpatient. At the end of the 100 days, Nick should just need maintenance chemo. It's good to have a plan!
I must add that this plan is just that...a plan. We fully expect God to order our steps and intervene in ways that only He can. He has moved in miraculous ways so far. So, even though there are lots of questions about how this will all work, I know that He will work it out.
We are learning first hand about what God says about how He cares for us:
Luke 12
22 Then He said to His disciples, “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on. 23 Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing. 24 Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds? 25 And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? 26 If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest? 27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 28 If then God so clothes the grass, which today is in the field and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith?
Personal request: Please do not wait until a very difficult time in your life to begin to trust God with your life. If we had not had the foundation of relationship with Him before this adventure began I can not even imagine what it would be like now. Get to know Him. Dare to take Him at His Word. There won't be a moment of regret! It is well.
Monday, October 24, 2011
Still Very Much Persuaded.
We just got word on the biopsy. It was not clean. I have to admit that I am very sad. This hurts so deeply, but it does not change my perspective. So many things have happened of late to people that I love and respect. Life is sometimes very difficult...yet inexplicable peace abounds.
I really do not understand why we go through what we do, but I do know that God has seen the end from the beginning. As long as we keep our hearts turned toward Him in the meantime...it will all end well. We know in Whom we have believed, and we are still very much persuaded that He is able to keep us...It is well.
I really do not understand why we go through what we do, but I do know that God has seen the end from the beginning. As long as we keep our hearts turned toward Him in the meantime...it will all end well. We know in Whom we have believed, and we are still very much persuaded that He is able to keep us...It is well.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Small World
I just want to share a short tidbit with y'all. I just looked at the "stats" for this blog. I have known that people were looking at it from all over the world, but the numbers are amazing me. I realize that some of these people may have come across it by mistake or are just curious, but some may be praying for us...or some may be coming to faith because of it. I started this to keep people informed and praying, but God has most assuredly begun to use it for His Kingdom purposes as well.
Here is the list of blog followers outside of the US. Please pray for these people that are a world away:
Russia 15
Germany 10
United Kingdom 8
New Zealand 6
Romania 3
Costa Rica 2
Botswana 1
China 1
Italy 1
Here is the list of blog followers outside of the US. Please pray for these people that are a world away:
Russia 15
Germany 10
United Kingdom 8
New Zealand 6
Romania 3
Costa Rica 2
Botswana 1
China 1
Italy 1
Endurance
Nick came through the bone marrow biopsy very well. He has been in pain for a couple of days, but that won't last long. He is still really feeling very well aside from that. -We haven't gotten the results yet, but I will share them as soon as we know.
He has had a rest from chemo for the last 3 weeks now. So, his hair has started to grow back. The last time that it started to grow back sparsely it was bright red. Now it is nearly black. Who knows what it will look like when all this is over. It may be blonde and curly????
We go back this coming Wednesday and Thursday to restart the chemo process. I really dread this for him, but at least we have experience with it. There shouldn't be any surprises or unknown events.
The word for the day ( for me at least) seems to be endurance. God really does make enduring easy for us. We have the "Peace that passes understanding" and way more grace than we deserve, but I guess the bottom line is that there is no choice but to endure. We want the outcome of this adventure to be God's outcome. So why would we even consider giving up and controlling the outcome ourselves. Our only hope lies in God's intervention...so, we endure.
Romans 15:4 For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.
Please don't give up whatever it is that God has called you to endure. Just decide that it is well.
He has had a rest from chemo for the last 3 weeks now. So, his hair has started to grow back. The last time that it started to grow back sparsely it was bright red. Now it is nearly black. Who knows what it will look like when all this is over. It may be blonde and curly????
We go back this coming Wednesday and Thursday to restart the chemo process. I really dread this for him, but at least we have experience with it. There shouldn't be any surprises or unknown events.
The word for the day ( for me at least) seems to be endurance. God really does make enduring easy for us. We have the "Peace that passes understanding" and way more grace than we deserve, but I guess the bottom line is that there is no choice but to endure. We want the outcome of this adventure to be God's outcome. So why would we even consider giving up and controlling the outcome ourselves. Our only hope lies in God's intervention...so, we endure.
Romans 15:4 For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.
Please don't give up whatever it is that God has called you to endure. Just decide that it is well.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Sight And Vision Are Not The Same Things.
Nick had a good report from his orthopedic surgeon...no further degeneration in any of his 4 spinal fracture sites. He has to continue to wear his back brace for a short while, and then can wear it as needed.
He goes back next Thursday for the crucial bone marrow biopsy. "Clean" is the word that we expecting to hear. It's a smidgen like the prophet in the Old Testament who was believing for rain after such a long season of drought. He said that he could see a cloud the size of a man's hand, and that he could hear the sound of the abundance of rain. We may have to squint a bit, but we can see a tall, healed, gregarious, pain free, cancer free Nicholas making way too much noise upstairs. I can see it...not fully in focus yet...but I can see it coming. Can you?
Because sight and vision are not the same things....It is well!
He goes back next Thursday for the crucial bone marrow biopsy. "Clean" is the word that we expecting to hear. It's a smidgen like the prophet in the Old Testament who was believing for rain after such a long season of drought. He said that he could see a cloud the size of a man's hand, and that he could hear the sound of the abundance of rain. We may have to squint a bit, but we can see a tall, healed, gregarious, pain free, cancer free Nicholas making way too much noise upstairs. I can see it...not fully in focus yet...but I can see it coming. Can you?
Because sight and vision are not the same things....It is well!
Thursday, October 13, 2011
I Will Be Moseying :)
Back to Vandy today to the orthopedic doctor. Hopefully we will get a good report on Nick's back. He has felt pretty good all week long. I am so thankful for this time!! It is like they have given him a fall break from chemo, and the boy (young man) sure did need a vacation. The lessened pain and greater energy has allowed him to be up much more than usual. So, I'm sure that it is also contributing to him getting stronger overall.
The next phase may be the most rough yet. So it will be good to go into it with renewed strength and a fresh mind set. I am encouraged!
Please share the Mission-Remission link with anyone that you wish. It will be a fun day. There will be lots of runners...but there will also be lots of walkers, strollers, amblers, shufflers, moseying, and the like. I will fit somewhere in the later category.
I have a test this morning...so this is a short post.
44 to you all, and keep praying!!
It is well!
The next phase may be the most rough yet. So it will be good to go into it with renewed strength and a fresh mind set. I am encouraged!
Please share the Mission-Remission link with anyone that you wish. It will be a fun day. There will be lots of runners...but there will also be lots of walkers, strollers, amblers, shufflers, moseying, and the like. I will fit somewhere in the later category.
I have a test this morning...so this is a short post.
44 to you all, and keep praying!!
It is well!
Sunday, October 9, 2011
It's Not About Gold Stars (Although I Like Gold Stars)
We have had a couple of great days! Nick has felt better than he has in a very long time. (Yeah!!!) This morning when I was getting dressed I heard Glenn coming up the stairs. It had to be Glenn because Nick can't climb the stairs. I was minding my own business...just straightening my hair...when I see a shiny bald reflection in the mirror. It was Nick. He came upstairs like it was no big deal.
We spent most of the week at Vanderbilt. He got the high dose methyltrexate. It is really a strange process. They started the chemo about 9:00 Monday night. It took 3 hours to infuse. Then 24 hours later they started giving him the antidote every 6 hours around the clock. He then had to stay in the hospital until there was no evidence of the drug left in his system. It was really hard on him...but what a difference a couple of days make.
While he was there they also tested his adrenal output. Because he had been on high doses of steroids for so many months his adrenal glands had all but shut down. So, since he has been off of steroids for a couple of weeks, it was a good time to test and get an accurate reading. They were only producing at 30%. As he was being discharged his doctor wrote a prescription for a different kind of steroid. His words were, " Take this for a couple of days and you will feel better than you have in a long time." Well, just let me tell ya....he was correct. The goal will be to restart his natural adrenal function, but for the time being we are so thankful for the wisdom that God has given man to produce needed pharmaceutical products!! He has had much more energy, less pain, and a much more sunny outlook. (Word of wisdom...Be wise and take your medicine while you are waiting for God to heal you. Taking needed medicine does not equal a lack of faith.)
I got to go to church today. I was so excited!!! It had been several weeks. About a week ago I was standing in my kitchen crying. It was just one of those days. I was talking to God as though I could see Him standing by my fridge. (You can talk to your Daddy like that you know.) As I was finishing my rant I said, "I'm such a mess...I haven't even been to church in weeks." Immediately I could hear Him speak to my heart, "You are not a mess, and I know just where you are."
Please be encouraged that God does know where each of of is. He sees your situation and mine, and does not judge us like man does. He sees the painful (and joyous) cries of our hearts and knows where our hearts are turned. Yes, we should be a part of a local church. Yes, we have the duty and calling to share the Gospel. Yes, He does require many things of us. The difference is that His judgement comes according to the conditions of our hearts, not by outward appearance. He sets the priorities for our lives according to His word:
I Timothy 5:8 But those who won’t care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers.
I realize that the above scripture goes with the theme of caring for widows or orphans, but God makes it pretty clear that taking care of the needs in our own households is a big priority with Him.
There are times when we somehow manage to do it all, and times when we need stay home and tend to fevers and nausea. There are times when family relationships are good, and times when you need to get away and work on them. God's rules and regulations are not for the purpose of getting gold stars on some divine attendance chart. His rules are to lead us to further His kingdom and change us step by step...moment by moment...glory by glory closer to the image of Jesus.
It's all about the heart. It is well!
We spent most of the week at Vanderbilt. He got the high dose methyltrexate. It is really a strange process. They started the chemo about 9:00 Monday night. It took 3 hours to infuse. Then 24 hours later they started giving him the antidote every 6 hours around the clock. He then had to stay in the hospital until there was no evidence of the drug left in his system. It was really hard on him...but what a difference a couple of days make.
While he was there they also tested his adrenal output. Because he had been on high doses of steroids for so many months his adrenal glands had all but shut down. So, since he has been off of steroids for a couple of weeks, it was a good time to test and get an accurate reading. They were only producing at 30%. As he was being discharged his doctor wrote a prescription for a different kind of steroid. His words were, " Take this for a couple of days and you will feel better than you have in a long time." Well, just let me tell ya....he was correct. The goal will be to restart his natural adrenal function, but for the time being we are so thankful for the wisdom that God has given man to produce needed pharmaceutical products!! He has had much more energy, less pain, and a much more sunny outlook. (Word of wisdom...Be wise and take your medicine while you are waiting for God to heal you. Taking needed medicine does not equal a lack of faith.)
I got to go to church today. I was so excited!!! It had been several weeks. About a week ago I was standing in my kitchen crying. It was just one of those days. I was talking to God as though I could see Him standing by my fridge. (You can talk to your Daddy like that you know.) As I was finishing my rant I said, "I'm such a mess...I haven't even been to church in weeks." Immediately I could hear Him speak to my heart, "You are not a mess, and I know just where you are."
Please be encouraged that God does know where each of of is. He sees your situation and mine, and does not judge us like man does. He sees the painful (and joyous) cries of our hearts and knows where our hearts are turned. Yes, we should be a part of a local church. Yes, we have the duty and calling to share the Gospel. Yes, He does require many things of us. The difference is that His judgement comes according to the conditions of our hearts, not by outward appearance. He sets the priorities for our lives according to His word:
I Timothy 5:8 But those who won’t care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers.
I realize that the above scripture goes with the theme of caring for widows or orphans, but God makes it pretty clear that taking care of the needs in our own households is a big priority with Him.
There are times when we somehow manage to do it all, and times when we need stay home and tend to fevers and nausea. There are times when family relationships are good, and times when you need to get away and work on them. God's rules and regulations are not for the purpose of getting gold stars on some divine attendance chart. His rules are to lead us to further His kingdom and change us step by step...moment by moment...glory by glory closer to the image of Jesus.
It's all about the heart. It is well!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Mission Remission - November 12, 2011
Below is a link to more information about the Mission Remission 5K Run/Walk
A Bit of Normalcy ...Whatever That Is
Why are Sundays included with the "week end", when they are actually the first day of the week beginning? (Just a random thought that I had while pondering what to write.)
We are preparing to leave Monday for Vandy. As I said previously, Nick will be admitted and receive treatment all week. He is a bit anxious about the unknowns of this new chemo treatment. So, please pray for him to have that extra measure of peace that he needs. We have the week divided into slots of who goes when, and I think that it will all work. (It always does.) God tells us in His word that we should go ahead and make plans, but the crucial part is that we are to let Him actually order our steps. One of the hard things about being human is making those plans, and then allowing Him to peacefully change them. Sometimes we go His way...but needlessly kicking and screaming. It is all so much more peaceful when we just go with His flow.
We have already gotten some response from people donating blood in Nick's honor. I didn't tell him about it ahead of time. He just started getting a couple of cards, and he thought that was pretty awesome. Blood donors are heroes. You get my most heartfelt thanks!
I also realize that some of you can not give blood for whatever reason. Please do not feel badly. Everyone can pray, and that is the most important thing that anyone can do.
This week has been a good week. To demonstrate...I came home from clinicals about 12:45 on Friday afternoon. I had just enough time to make a PB&J, whatever Nick wanted for lunch, and get back to lab at 1:30. When I come in the door I always head straight to Nick, but this day his bed was conspicuously empty. I looked in the bathroom and all over the downstairs, but no Nick. I really wasn't worried, but I texted him pretty quickly. Megan had come and gotten him earlier, and they were eating at Backyard Burgers. It is amazing how just a little bit of normalcy can make a Mom feel so good!
We also had several amazing blessings this week. We serve a God who knows exactly where we are. It is well!
We are preparing to leave Monday for Vandy. As I said previously, Nick will be admitted and receive treatment all week. He is a bit anxious about the unknowns of this new chemo treatment. So, please pray for him to have that extra measure of peace that he needs. We have the week divided into slots of who goes when, and I think that it will all work. (It always does.) God tells us in His word that we should go ahead and make plans, but the crucial part is that we are to let Him actually order our steps. One of the hard things about being human is making those plans, and then allowing Him to peacefully change them. Sometimes we go His way...but needlessly kicking and screaming. It is all so much more peaceful when we just go with His flow.
We have already gotten some response from people donating blood in Nick's honor. I didn't tell him about it ahead of time. He just started getting a couple of cards, and he thought that was pretty awesome. Blood donors are heroes. You get my most heartfelt thanks!
I also realize that some of you can not give blood for whatever reason. Please do not feel badly. Everyone can pray, and that is the most important thing that anyone can do.
This week has been a good week. To demonstrate...I came home from clinicals about 12:45 on Friday afternoon. I had just enough time to make a PB&J, whatever Nick wanted for lunch, and get back to lab at 1:30. When I come in the door I always head straight to Nick, but this day his bed was conspicuously empty. I looked in the bathroom and all over the downstairs, but no Nick. I really wasn't worried, but I texted him pretty quickly. Megan had come and gotten him earlier, and they were eating at Backyard Burgers. It is amazing how just a little bit of normalcy can make a Mom feel so good!
We also had several amazing blessings this week. We serve a God who knows exactly where we are. It is well!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)